I apologize for the long delay. We have had a lot of correspondence, and I have been out sick with the flu and sinus surgery. Hopefully, you will still be open to studying these good questions together from a Bible basis.
To be straightforward, whether or not a particular doctrine can have a certain effect on a person, according to our experience and opinion, is not really relevant. Just like Israel who thought it seemed good to move the ark on a new cart, pulled by ox (
I Corinthians 13:1-3), you and I also may think something is good, becomes it seems good to us. Of course, as Uzzah can attest, that will not necessarily work out so well (
I Chronicles 13:9-12; 15:13). Or, like the people, whom Jesus said would be shocked to learn of their error on Judgment day (
Matthew 7:21-23), we may sincerely believe something to be true and approved by God, but that is not enough to make it true, much less redemptive. I believe the real question, with which I am sure you would agree, is,
"What does the Scriptures say?".
So, I am happy to grant that I have misunderstood the intentions of Calvinism and the impact it has had on you personally. However, would you be willing to study the validity of that doctrine as compared with Scripture? We have a whole series of articles on the subject, comparing the major tenets as is typically embraced in Calvinism with what the Bible teaches. The index for the series is here:
http://www.insearchoftruth.org/articles ... #calvinism
Most of essential questions that I would address would come directly from those articles. Actually, I think the passage you quoted stands as a good proof text against standard Calvinism:
Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure. (Philippians 2:12-13)
Yes, God works in us. I would never argue against, nor diminish that fact. Therefore, I would oppose Catholic or Pelagic doctrine that emphasizes our meritorious works. However, I believe the Bible also teaches that we have a responsibility too - even in salvation. Furthermore, I believe that if we do not fulfill those conditions, we will not obtain mercy (repentance is just one condition,
Luke 13:1-9). Well, much more could be said, but maybe we should start with this point - Total Inherited Depravity. I would not deny that men can become depraved (
I Timothy 4:2; Ephesians 4:17-19; Romans 1:18-32), possibly even totally depraved (
Hebrews 10:26-29). However, does the Bible teach we are
born depraved, much less totally depraved? If not, it seems the entire foundation of Calvinism collapses, and Calvinism with it. Would you like to discuss this point? My initial thoughts are best represented here:
http://www.insearchoftruth.org/articles/depravity.html
If you think I have misrepresented the appeal or results of this doctrine, please overlook that for now, because ultimately, all that matters is what God thinks on the subject, and there is only way to know that (
Ephesians 3:3-5; II Timothy 3:16-17; II Peter 1:3).